Oh. I think I know why he’s here. 

 I think it all started when he kept booting people from his group for silly things, like putting the word bitch on a t-shirt. Somehow we started referring to him as a dick and somewhere along the way, we may have photoshopped an actual dick on his head. 

Maybe he didn’t like our artwork.

Checking out his fake profile again, I can’t help but wonder what his deal is. 

Why hide who you are? Why not just ask to join using his real account?

Certain that the profile is him, I bring it to Molly’s attention. 

 “How do we handle this?” I ask, filling her in.

“How about no men?” She suggests.

“Yes! No boys allowed.” 

As far as the admin, I should have ignored him and his request, but like a jackass, I don’t. Instead, I message his real profile to explain that we simply aren’t going to let him in. I make sure to assure him that the fake profile is a nice touch, though. 

To me, this whole thing isn’t a big deal and I thought that would be the end of it. I was wrong. A couple of months later, he boots me from every craft group that he admins. It doesn’t bother me too much. His groups aren’t any fun. I know I won’t miss them.

Accepting my role as a crafty outcast, I think that surely, this is the end of it. I was wrong again. When he doesn't get a reaction from me, he boots all of my crafty friends. 

        Ok, now this is ridiculous. 

        “Can you believe this?” I complain to Molly. “He’s booting our friends too.”

“You know, people only join that group for the free art files anyway. We should just create our own file group,” Molly suggests casually.

“You’re right. We should. I can help grow the group. Count me in.”

Overnight, Molly creates yet another spinoff group mimicking the features of his. By now, my own local group has about a thousand members and I think I may know just how to build us this file group. I’m not entirely positive that I can, but once again, I’m willing to fuck around and find out.

 “This is going to be fun,” I promise her. “I’m going to build us our own crafty empire that consists of real women, just like us. Without men coming along insisting what is and what isn’t ladylike.” 

What exactly could they possibly know about being a lady, anyway?

Sure, we are a little sassy, inappropriate, and sometimes rather crude, but not everyone is Susie Homemaker. After all, even food can be both salty and sweet. Why can't we?

As the mission of growing a fun, crafty empire begins to unfold; we recruit a few more crafty hands from our core group of Crafty Bitches. 

There are tasks out of the ass. There are files to load, folders to organize, and documents to create. None of these are my strong suit, so I opt out of all the above and begin immediately work on recruiting crafty members instead, as promised. After all, a group is only as great as the people it consists of.